Are You Debbie Downer? Negative Nellie?

I have so many clients who seek me out because they are exhausted by old-fashioned complaining therapy. I’m not saying that it’s not wonderful to have someone acknowledge that you had a dreadful childhood, because it is. However, that antiquated technique can’t change your brain. It will just keep you stuck. It can’t heal the long-term depression that’s robbing you of your day-to-day joy.

What can heal? Hypnotherapy, Cognitive Behavior Modification, Awareness Therapy, and Past-Life Regression can give you a way out. I can offer you a ladder out of your lonely pit of despair. I can teach you techniques so you can climb out of that dreary pit of despair, ie, your long-term depression.

First, I always start with research and proof. I offer my clients scientific evidence that demonstrates the techniques I teach are easy to learn and highly effective.

One of my cohorts at UCLA was neuroscientist Jeffrey Schwartz, MD. I use his methods so that my clients can learn how to out-smart their Obsessive-Compulsive thoughts, or OCD. No demonizing here. Those brains are their superpowers, but they need to learn how to use them effectively.

His four steps, “Relabel, Reattribute, refocus, reevaluate,” are similar to Byron Katie’s questions:  Is it true? These techniques can rewire your brain and teach you how to break from those compulsive loops that can spiral you down into the depths of depression.

His work proves, using FMRIs scans, that you can retrain your brain away from those “Debbie Downer,” Negative Nellie thoughts that create havoc in your body.

That’s why in my first session, I just suggest that clients investigate what they are saying to themselves, using Awareness Therapy. Bruce Lipton, MD, whose work I admire, discusses how hypnotherapy can harness the power of your subconscious mind. His “Biology of Belief” explains that subconscious beliefs dictate our behaviors and health. By first being aware of what you are saying to yourself, you can change these negative beliefs and learn how to heal your own brain-body connection. No pills needed.

Talking about drugs? John Ratey’s groundbreaking book:  “Spark: The Revolutionary New Science of Exercise and the Brain,” underscores how exercise can spark up our brains like fireworks. Exercise promotes the release of feel-good neurotransmitters, like serotonin, and that can help lift the fog of depression. That’s why I encourage my clients to exercise, eat good food, and love themselves. It’s not just one thing. It’s like remixing a song – adding beats and rhythms to make it something you’d love to dance to. (I encourage everyone to dance!)

Now imagine pairing that physical spark with some mind-bending cognitive behavior modification. Enter another UCLA favorite, Peter Levine, PhD.  Peter’s research proves that tweaking our thought patterns can effectively combat depression and heal trauma. CBT helps clients heal from traumatic events in the past that are re-surfacing in the present. I use his proven methods when healing my clients’ sexual trauma, which can also cause depression:  “Healing Sexual Trauma,” Peter Levine, MD.

Also, at UCLA, Dan Siegel, PhD, famous for his work with children, “The Developing Mind,” offers insights into how our minds, brains, and relationships interact. Dan focuses on the importance of integration. Simply put, it’s about getting our brains and our bodies to work as harmoniously as a well-coordinated jazz band.

Once again, it’s not just one thing. Bessel van der Kolk’s groundbreaking work, “The Body Keeps the Score” (a book I’ve been recommending for more than ten years), is now at the top of the New York Times best-seller list. He reveals how trauma and stress are imprinted on our bodies and can trigger depression. Healing, then, also involves addressing those physical sensations—how our bodies talk to us through our emotions. In my work with clients, through hypnosis, I help them target the places where old rage and sorrow are stored and then release them.

Sometimes those traumas come from a past life. That’s why the techniques I learned from my teachers, Brian Weiss, MD, and Michael Newton, PhD, using past-life regression, can help clients uncover imprinted memories from another lifetime. For instance, I once had a beautiful young woman racked with guilt. She always felt that she’d done some despicable act. When I dropped her into a recent past life, she saw herself as an 18-year-old German U-boat sailor (see “Das Boot”). His job was to sit with a periscope and scan the horizon for American destroyers. He got bored, and whoops! The destroyer was overhead and dropped a thethal depth charge.   The whole crew knew that they were about to die, and it was his fault. They all died, and she was born with that guilt. In that regression, we found a way for her to forgive that boy for being a bored teenager. She let go of her shame.

Lately, I’ve encouraged clients to try shaking up their nervous system by visiting the “Rage Room.” For years, I’ve suggested that people scream where no one can hear them or break pottery. One of my clients created a business helping people, but now there is a safe place. I suggested it to a client, and she reported that it was great. She’s gone twice! But she said to go alone. You need to be able to scream out your rage, and that releases it to the universe.

What ties all these methods together is their non-reliance on prescription drugs. They remind us that healing can come from understanding ourselves, learning to love ourselves, forgiving, and moving on. If you need help being reminded that you are an eternal soul, resilient, and with potential far beyond your current understanding, please call me  (323) 933-4377

I can help you embrace the journey you are on now and stop complaining to yourself, because that causes your depression. Oh, and if you want to stay looking good? Wear a hat! Keep your skin out of the sun and smile!

Sending you love,

Stephanie

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