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No one says forgiveness is easy – if it were easy, everyone would do it, right? Did this ever happen to you? Someone (probably a relative or lover) does something so hurtful that there’s just no way you can ever forgive.
You play the event over and over in your head, and you know you’re right, and they’re oh so wrong! They hurt you so much!! They’re horrible! So why should you forgive them?
Because it’s hurting you more than it hurts them, so forgive them for yourself. That movie’s in your head, not theirs!
As Carolyn Myss says, “Not forgiving someone is like taking rat poison and hoping the other person will die.” So if you remain angry and self-righteous, you’re just poisoning yourself with anger. Anger, blame, and self-righteousness diminishes the quality of your life and do nothing to change the situation that made you so mad.
“Choose your energy over the need to be right – the need to be right is for narcissists and kids.” All of my clients will recognize that sentence – it’s from the 2nd session, the Inner Child Work, where I encourage clients to see the person who hurt them as a three-year-old. Then find compassion – everyone has a history of hurt that made them do whatever it is they did.
So if you decide you want to be happy in 2020, begin by forgiving and finding compassion.
How? Start with you. Write a love letter to your own wounded Inner Child that’s filled with the compassion it yearns for. Forgive yourself and cultivate compassion for yourself first, and that will be the gateway drug to finding forgiveness and compassion for the pesky people who are your relatives, friends, and lovers.
If you need help getting down to the authentic compassionate you, Awareness Therapy, Cognitive Behavior Modification, and Past Life Regression can change your life, because they change your perspective. Call me. (323) 933-4377
Sending you love,
Stephanie
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